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ALANI Methods


Tragedy to Triumphancy: An Emotional Healing Process

The greatest lesson I learned about healing from past emotional pain, is that it is a process which requires active and ongoing work.  First, it took time for me to come to terms with what happened to me and second, it took more time to find a way for me to be freed from the clinching debilitating life-altering grip of hurt and pain! As time progressed, not only did I grow in strength and freedom while journeying from tragedy to triumphancy, I understood that moving toward healing requires ongoing applications of love, compassion and forgiveness! I’m not sure where you are on your healing journey – whether you’ve never addressed it or you have tried 100 times, recognize (naturally speaking) the work of healing is ongoing.

Allow me to share my 3 techniques:
Journaling
A.L.A.P.
BRIDGE


Journaling Method

With a goal to free you from your emotional hurts and pains so you can live a fruitful, productive life, this journal is designed to help you stay in tune with your positive and/or negative emotional state over the course of more than one year. What you will find inside this journal is a long list of positive and negative emotions. You will review these lists each week to determine your current emotional state. You will also find within these pages inspirational scriptures and other sayings about love, compassion, forgiveness and healing. This journal is divided into 64 weeks and asks a series of questions you should address on a weekly basis, which are designed to get you thinking constructively about your emotional state. Additionally, for each week, there is a section reserved for you to jot down your thoughts independent of these listed questions.

If you would like to begin taking a closer look at your emotional stability on your tragedy to triumphancy journey, please contact me today at author@alani.org to request your FREE copy of Alani’s Emotional Stability Journal!

A.L.A.P. Method

This self-guided approach will remind you of the metamorphosis of a butterfly. In short, the butterfly lays eggs during the creation stage.  The egg becomes a caterpillar which grows during the feeding stage.  This caterpillar then cocoons itself into a chrysalis; lots of changes occur in this transformation stage.  And finally, a beautiful butterfly emerges from the chrysalis ready to reproduce during the reproductive stage.  Like the metamorphosis of a butterfly, ALANI’s A.L.A.P. Method also has 4 distinct steps and is designed to take you through a series of applicable activities. 

After reading a description of each step, click the "view activity" button to view and complete the accompanying activity. You’ll want to invest 4-6 months to journey through this method. It will be helpful to have access to a traditional or electronic journal or notebook to log your thoughts and to complete these activities as you take the challenge to journey from tragedy to triumphancy.

HELPFUL HINT: So that you are not overwhelmed by the assignments and remain encouraged to endure until the end, print the activity section you are currently working on and only focus on one sub-step at a time.

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Acknowledging

The egg starts the metamorphosis for the butterfly, as acknowledging starts the A.L.A.P. Method for humans. In order to achieve healing, you must first admit something needs to be healed. You must accept that your life needs to be improved upon in some way and that your situation (as bad as it may be and as much as it may hurt) must be voiced and spoken. When you make the scary decision to disclose your vulnerability by sharing and acknowledging your emotional pain, you in essence, are showing love toward yourself as well as others.

View Activity

Butterfly Eggs

Caterpillar

Learning

Where the caterpillar advances and consumes lots of food during the feeding stage, likewise humans grow in knowledge. You are encouraged to learn about and to engage further in the healing process. Learning more about the why and how of the situation will lead you closer to healing. When you decide to continue in this place, you exhibit compassion…toward yourself. You know your situation and you desire to move from your place of tragedy to that of triumphancy.

View Activity


Applying

As the caterpillar advances to the next stage in its metamorphosis, it undergoes many radical changes in its chrysalis. This is known as the transformation stage. And as humans grow in knowledge, they too should experience change. While reflecting on all you have empowered yourself to learn, you are hopefully beginning to realize the importance of not holding on to emotional hurt because it hinders progression from your state of tragedy. As hard as it may be, you understand and surrender to the significance of forgiveness. ALANI calls this applying because this is where you begin to practice what you have learned to move you closer to healing.

View Activity

Chrysalis

Butterfly

Proclaiming

Once the caterpillar has fully transformed, it emerges from the chrysalis a beautiful butterfly; this is the final stage of the butterfly’s metamorphosis.  In its adult form, it is now ready to reproduce by laying caterpillar eggs.  We know this to be the reproductive stage.  In a similar fashion, humans have reached the final step when they emerge a beautiful butterfly.  In this stage ALANI calls proclaiming, the human is able to declare and demonstrate freedom from the bondage of their tragedy.  How so? Through acknowledging, learning and applying. Having done all of this, you are one step closer to liberation from emotional pain.  Like the butterfly lays eggs to start a new metamorphosis, humans share their experience with others to help encourage them to begin the healing process journey.

View Activity

NOTE: See Simplified Activities Example below for an idea of how to approach these activities. This A.L.A.P. method can be repeated for 1) any emotional hurt you have experienced and/or 2) more intense levels of emotional pain. I encourage you to challenge yourself (if you are really serious this time) with regard to moving closer to healing from your emotional hurt and pain.

Simplified Activities Example:

I am acknowledging feeling angry after I was overlooked for a promotion because not only did I “pay my dues”, but I am qualified. I’ve been an administrative assistant for 3 years and have seen my co-worker be promoted who has been in her position less than 2 years. I like my job, but lately I have not been giving my usual effort. And this bothers me because I take pride in my work. The way I’ve been acting is not me; I am not happy about the time I’ve spent in this emotional place and I desire to be healed.

I have learned that my co-worker was transferred from another location and came with 2 years of experience. So really, she has more time on the job than me. I have learned that I jumped to conclusions which caused me to become angry prematurely. I was so focused on getting an increase to purchase a new car, nothing else matter. I learned that anger can be toxic having a negative impact on my health if I don’t learn to control it.

Wanting a new car is really what fueled my anger. I will create a budget to save enough money to purchase it in the near future. That may mean getting a part-time job. In the meantime, I will continue to apply for other positions at my company for which I am qualified. I realize having a different perspective is helpful in conquering negative emotions.

CONGRATULATIONS on accepting this emotional healing challenge! I am happy you’ve decided to begin acknowledging and displaying love; learning and showing compassion; applying your knowledge and exhibiting forgiveness. Keep in mind there are a plethora of approaches to overcoming emotional hurt and pain and no two people are alike…what works for some, may not work for all; however, I am confident that with you taking on this challenge, you are on your way to achieving healing!

There is A LOT of work ahead of you in this endeavor, but also gratifying in the end. Remind yourself that your approach to this challenge is like eating an elephant…one bite at a time! Print this document and post in an area you frequent daily to help keep you on track as well as to remind you to complete your activities.

Upon completion of this method, if you’re willing to share, I would love to hear about your experience as well as to read your essays. Feel free to forward them to author@alani.org.

Let’s get started!


BRIDGE Method

This small group approach is designed to help participants:

  1. Take ownership for their emotional healing.
  2. Create a path to cross the BRIDGE from tragedy to triumphancy.
  3. Move closer to operating in their life’s purpose.

This 6 step method will be an eye-opening program designed to get you to pursue freedom so you can live a fruitful and productive life after emotional hurt. Overcoming this pain is not for the faint of heart, as there are many unexpected peaks and valleys. After living through two life altering deep emotional hurts, I have spent years creating what became this BRIDGE program and I am excited to share it with those who want to achieve healing in a world full of personal tragedies.

In order to live a happier and more productive life, your FREEDOM is paramount!

How many times have you looked at yourself in the mirror and questioned:  Who Am I?  What’s happened to my happy-go-lucky self?  What am I afraid of?  When will this pain end?  Where is my energy?  Why me?  Why am I angry/sad?  How did I get here?

This program will explore all of these questions and more.  Having been in a place asking most of these questions personally, BRIDGE was designed to assist you in finding answers to these questions.  We all can identify with having the wind knocked out of us and left “in the middle” of something unfortunate happening to us and getting to the other side where we can breathe again. BRIDGE will show you how to navigate to triumphancy from your state of tragedy.  It is from this new found place that you can live a life of abundance and without bondage.

Participation in this program will require you to go to potentially uncomfortable places.  You will revisit your past and confront the “real” you.  For many, you may laugh; you may cry; you will step out of your comfort zone.  But at the end of the day, you will be a better you!

I’m not sure where you are on your healing journey – whether you’ve never addressed it or you have tried 100 times, recognize (naturally speaking) the work of healing is ongoing. Congratulations on taking this step to freedom!

Participants will need to commit 8-10 weeks to complete the BRIDGE Method. Each session is expected to last approximately 2 hours. For a weekend session, plan on approximately 12-15 hours covering Friday evening, all day Saturday and Sunday morning. Contact info@alani.org for more details regarding participation in this BRIDGE Method.  

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With the Emotional Stability Journal and both the A.L.A.P. and BRIDGE methods, it is my hope that you will come to realize you can live a fruitful and productive life after emotional hurt and pain. You might also come to understand how your approach to your emotional hurts can fuel or deflate the severity and/or longevity of the pain. Through ALANI’s Tragedy to Triumphancy Methods, live a life without bondage!                      

Healing is achievable!